Counseling: shower scene

"Hey there, beautiful," Hizashi crooned as he pulled the shower curtain back for a peek. 

Elly choked on a mouthful of water and then laughed. "Ugh! What do you need, sweetie?"

"Oh, nothing." He wriggled his eyebrows at her lasciviously. "I just wanted to watch."

"Hizashi."

"Aww. No? Well, then can I join you? I need m'back scrubbed." He yanked the curtain further open and stepped into the steamy mist. 

"Sure." She hugged him and handed him the soap. There was silence for a while as she rubbed the soap on his shoulders and back. He whistled happily, holding his hair out of the way so she could continue. 

"You know, showering used to be harder for me as a kid," she yawned, patting his sodden puff of golden chest hair.

"Nmm?" They swapped places and he rinsed his body off. "I know you've said it's hard to want to even get up when you're depressed. Like that one time I helped you and stayed home with ya."

"I love you so much, you know," she sighed wistfully. "That really did help. As an adult it's hard enough, but at one point as a very young girl I decided if <i>everyone</i>, including my family, was going to make me out as this horrible monster that was so ugly, I would just give up."

"Aw." He lathered his hair as she watched.

"It really is hard to care about showering or self care when you’re depressed. I get that now. But my mother saw a stinky kid that would embarrass her, so she put an end to it real quick. She demanded I shower, and when I agreed, as if that wasn’t good enough - as if somehow her beaten down, abused as hell kid that did whatever she asked without a second effing thought would disobey her – she decided she would make certain I showered...  <i>by watching me</i>."

Hizashi spluttered water, his eyes squeezing tightly shut. "Just when I think you can't shock me any more with your childhood tales, what the everloving fu-"

"I know." She wiped the shampoo gently out of his eyes. "My mother stood there as I stripped, got in and showered. The entire time she stood there with a pissed off expression on her face and I cried, freaking out, ashamed and totally embarrassed. I always showered then." She shuddered in disgust. "Always always <i>always</i>. I was terrified about her watching me, which sickened me and I hated it. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I saw this as totally and completely wrong."

He swept his long, blond hair back, squeezing the water out of it. "Shit, babe, and you never told me until now. We've showered together a lot."

"I know." She grinned. "Sometimes the abuse hurts but now the act doesn't cause me to react badly for some reason. But I mean, you haven't really just watched me the whole time. We do it together. I think if you watched from outside for too long, I might freak out, though."

"Noted," he murmured.