Joking hazard

 Aizawa Shota was mostly a rather enigmatic man. He sat, slumped over with his solitary gray eye focused in front of him and nothing else.

That was until he heard the sound of a familiar voice. He visibly cringed for a moment, the bloodshot eye widening and his mouth twisting into a horrified grimace.

<i>She</i> was here.

"Do you think we should have a summer wedding?" Ms. Joke immediately found her prey the moment she walked into campus and homed in with declarations of one-sided love. "I'd love that, but the season wouldn't matter, really, any time would be perfect!" She waved a gloved hand around in excitement, her eyes squinted nearly shut in mirth.

"We're not getting married," Aizawa stated flatly for the tenth time. He and a handful of colleagues were sitting outside watching the students having an early morning run.

Most noteable was the school counselor, who was ostensibly providing support for a teen she was mentoring. She seemed hardly able to wave or cheer, however, and instead slouched further into herself as the green-haired woman continued to harass Aizawa.

Elly was torn.

What the other lady - <i>lady?</i> that's <i>the joke!</i>, she thought angrily -- was doing was absolutely sexual harassment. Elly always did what she believed to be the right thing no matter what, no exceptions. Yet she knew butting in on such joking caused her to be ostrasized in other jobs due to no one else taking offense. She also had suspicions that her emotional neutrality might be compromised in this situation. So, despite her objections she waited, cringing inwardly and biting her tongue (at one point, quite literally).

The homeroom teacher's replies were quick and harsh, but she was undeterred. "A long engagement is fine! It'll give us time to pick the venue, and -"

She prattled on and Aizawa ignored her.

Elly, however, decided enough was enough and cleared her throat to get the visitor's attention.

"Excuse me, Ms. Joke, but he's continually refused your advances. It's clearly not welcome and it's making some of us uncomfortable. I'd like to ask you to stop, please."

The look she received was incredulous... until the Smile Hero decided the other woman was making a jest of her own. She tipped her head back and laughed loudly, slapping her knee a few times. When she finally got her breath back she crowed out something no one was expecting.

"Aw, he'd stop me if he could. This is our love language!" She threw her arms around the battered man for a hug. Startled, he didn't push her away at first, just turned his head to stare at her in disbelief.

Elly only saw the hug and him moving towards her.

<i>Yep. Emotional neutrality gone. Tears incoming. ABORT!</i>

She vanished, clambering down the bleachers and favoring haste in lieu of silence. Her paw pads were cushioned by design, but the scraping of the claws in her gloves against the metal and her rapid intake of breath were anything but quiet. And then the grass along the field flattened with the imprint of her boots as she ran blindly towards the campus.

"I was, uh, <i>not</i> expectin' that," Hizashi said as he watched her rapid departure.

Aizawa took the situation far more seriously.

In a fit of sudden, uncharacteristic rage his hair flew up and his single eye burst into color, glowing an ominous red as he wrenched free of the green-haired woman. "<i>That's enough</i>!"

She faltered, seeing anger for the first time directed at her instead of bland indifference. Hizashi whistled lowly from the sidelines, crossing his legs as he leaned back. Aizawa clenched his jaw, obviously biting back more that he wanted to say, and instead ran off down the bleachers in the direction Elly had gone, back to the campus main.

He reached her office and thrust his head in the door.

"Hey," he grunted. "Cheshire? You in here?"

Silence.

"I know you're in here. I can hear you breathing."

Her voice was very flat when she spoke. "Yes. I needed some time to compose myself."

"Agreed." He shuffled in and looked around the apparently empty office.

"I'm aware that I caused a scene and will come back after a time to apologize."

He rubbed at the back of his neck, grimacing slightly. "You don't have to."

"I acted unprofessionally. My colleagues need to be assured there will be no other incidents in the future." She paused, then continued in a softer tone, "Please leave, or I won't be able to calm down."

He trained his eye on the area she'd been speaking from. Color flowed back into her form and he could see that although she was acting clinical and detached, her eyes were red from weeping and her cheeks wet.

His expression must have given him away because Elly's lips firmed and she raised her chin in defiance. "I will <i>not</i> embarrass you further. I promise I'll regain complete composure before coming back."

He shook his head, confused. "No, I - wait." Aizawa glared at her, turned, and locked the door. He then strode over and in one quick movement scooped her up in his arms like she weighed nothing. The counselor was too stunned to move, her body stiffening with a mixture of fear and shock. "Just wait."

"What the hell?!"

"Let me think." He kicked out with one leg, moving her chair enough so he could sit and setting her in his lap.

Elly struggled, baring her teeth with her sharper canines flashing into view. "Put me <i>down</i>!"

"No." His grip tightened, though it was not uncomfortable. "I said, let me think for a minute. Calm down."

"<i>Calm down</i>? You've abducted me, you insensitive ass!"

The scruffy man closed his eye and let out a long-suffering sigh. "If I let you go, you'll vanish or run away. I want you to stay and hear me out."

She hissed angrily and tried to still the lashing of her tail, which was knocking papers off her desk with the wind it was creating. "You don't need to scold me!"

"I'm not going to."

"Then you don't need to sit me here like a child!"

"If you'd shut up for a second, I'm trying to confess," he told her acidly. "I don't have any experience in this kind of thing and I was sure I'd ruin it." He threw his hands up as if to say <i>there you have it</i>.

"Confess..?" Freed from his hold, she sat back but didn't stand up. Elly's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Confess what?"

"Ahhh. I sometimes forget you're not from here."

"No, I know what it <i>can</i> mean. But there's no way you mean it like that. Put me down."

"Is there a specific reason you object to sitting on my lap?" His arms circled her, surprisingly gentle on her upper back.

"Yes!" This time she almost wrenched free, fresh tears spilling from her tired eyes. "You don't mean it like I want! Damn it, stop whatever point you're trying to make, I get it -"

"No," he cut through her panicked cries. "You don't. So <i>listen</i>." Aizawa raised his voice enough to get her attention and she watched him warily.

"Well?"

"My pronunciation is poor," he warned her cryptically before frowning with concentration. He looked into her eyes and spoke haltingly in English. "I ...love you."

Her stomach clenched wildly, fluttering like her rapidly beating heart, and she wobbled in his lap. He swore and clasped her to him, tugging so she fell forward into his chest instead of onto the floor.

"Was that not right? What did I say?"

Elly clutched his black tracksuit in two hands, buried her face in the pile of capture weapon, and sobbed.

"Damn it, <i>why are you crying</i>?!"

She flinched from his tone but when she raised her head she saw he wasn't angry. His brow was furrowed, his single eye filled with concern and he appeared to have lost some of the color in his cheeks.

In short, he looked scared.

She sniffed, raised a hand to wipe her eyes and jumped when a strand of cloth was already there. He brushed it lightly across like a handkerchief, a strange use that was oddly touching. "I <i>never</i> thought you'd say that to me. Ever. I used to stop myself when I daydreamed, even, if it got to that point. The words - they never sounded right when I imagined them."

He raised an eyebrow. "And now?"

"I still can't believe it."

This time the capture thread whipped out to envelope her upper body. Startled, she let out a cat-like sound and he sighed heavily before he tugged her forward, his hands plunging into her hair and his lips seeking hers.

His stubble wasn't as scratchy as she imagined.

That was the only thought that flashed through her mind as they first met. As the kiss progressed they pressed harder, longer, until he let out a low hum of pleasure. Elly purred with delight in response and this inflamed him; she found herself wrestling tenderly with his tongue after he slipped it past her lips.

They needed air at some point, however, and parted with a moist sound and their combined heavy breathing. The capture weapon had unfurled at some time during their kisses, and she lifted a trembling hand to her lips in awe.

"Oh my god."

He broke out into that toothy grin she knew so well. "That good?"

She huffed in exasperation. "Aizawa -"

"No."

"Wha..?"

"I must insist my girlfriend calls me by my given name."

"Oh." Her ears perked up slowly as she thought this through. "Shota," she said slowly, testing how the name felt rolling off her tongue.

"Better."

"Yes, I think I am. Everything is."

"Do you still want to apologize?"

She sniffed once, angrily. "Not to <i>her</i>."

Aizawa actually <i>laughed</i>, and the dry sound caused her heart to soar. Ms. Joke had been trying for years to force him to do that with her quirk, but he gave it so willingly. "All right. How about this idea..?"

It was approximately twenty minutes or so when they reached the bleachers again. Elly put on a brave face and bowed in apology.

"Sorry," she sighed, smiling and then turning to stare at the other woman directly. "My boyfriend told me I should apologize for running off like that."

Aizawa grinned maniacally beside her, an arm wrapped casually around her waist.

"<i>OH, SNAP</i>!" Hizashi exclaimed so loudly several students drew curiously up at the edge of the field.

For once Aizawa didn't scold his friend.