"Hey, what's the big idea?" The tall, blond man spun around as his shoulder was poked at from behind. He had showered and changed from Present Mic back to his casual self, but then forgotten some tests he needed to grade and rushed back to campus.
Midnight stood there with her phone in one hand and a serious expression on her face. "Yamada -" She began, but he cut her quickly off.
"I gotta get back home, Ches needs me."
"Some of the public are calling for you to get a paternity test."
Hizashi frowned. "Uh, Kayama..? Why the hell would I need that?"
"Read for yourself," she said drily, holding up her phone. She had pulled up the reddit post in question, now on the front page. It was filled with men agreeing with the idea in a frightening mob; almost every one taking the side that every baby should be tested to prove it was theirs.
Hizashi's face paled as he read. "No way! I love Ches," he whimpered. "I married her because I love and <i>trust</i> her completely. Asking her to do this is saying I don't an' it would be doing it when she's most emotionally vulnerable. She freakin' cried over a rip in a piece of paper the other day!"
"Exactly. This isn't a question when you're married and have no reason to believe your partner is cheating on you. It's controlling - a loyalty test, really -- and that's disgusting."
"Wait... wuh - wait. <i>What?!</i>" Hizashi nearly dropped his phone. "Oh, shit. Oh god. They linked it on twitter and added her!"
"You'd better move fast. You're right that she's an emotional time bomb. This will destroy her if she sees it!" Kayama grabbed his arm and pushed, propelling him out the door. "Quickly, Yamada!"
Elly had seen it.
Hizashi cringed hard the moment he reached the door to their apartment and heard her sobbing inside. He made short work of the lock and darted in, not bothering to take off his shoes.
"M'here, babe!"
Elly was sitting in a pregnant sprawl on their couch with a box of tissues by her side. The pile of wadded up ones all around her was alarming, showing she'd been crying a long while.
"I'll do anything you want," she sobbed, clutching at the open front of his black shirt when he flung himself beside her. "We can get the test done after the baby is born -"
Hizashi's mind reeled. "I don't need that!" He wrapped his arms around her, humming in a soothing fashion. "Look, princess, those're just some stupid assholes on the internet. You're not some one night stand accusing me of getting you pregnant. We're <i>married</i>. We <i>wanted</i> this, an' I'm <i>happy</i>. You're givin' me the most ultimate gift ya can ever give, the most love you can show. What terrible person would question the woman they love like that?!"
"Yeah," she sniffled weakly. "Where's their loyalty test for them, then? How is the married woman supposed to make sure the guy isn't fucking all the bitches."
Hizashi snorted laughter. "'All the bitches.'"
"True, though! He questions her on this, well, when does it stop? What if she stays late at work one day? Does he automatically think she's cheating?" She paused, her ears flat and eyes lit up from within. Hizashi let her go on, rubbing her upper back gently.
"And what about the idiots who are all like, 'if she doesn't want the test and says she's hurt by the lack of trust it <i>proves</i> she's guilty'?" She spat angrily. "Bullshit! They're projecting. Most people would be pissed if they were questioned like this out of the blue. If they felt this way they should've told their prospective wives <i>before</i> marrying them. Then it wouldn't become a trust issue. And she could flat out reject a guy if she knew he was that paranoid."
"Agreed. But we can't ignore them; we're celebrity heroes. How about ya let me handle this one, love?"
"Okay. I'd only rip them apart anyway."
He snickered. "They deserve it, but yeah, no. I'll take 'em down a peg."
A half an hour later the tweet from <b>Present Mic (official)</b> was trending:
'<i>To those sayin I should have a paternity test done on our baby: I love</i> and <i>trust my wife, or I wouldn't've</i> married <i>her. Listen up: don't go there</i>.'
Midnight stood there with her phone in one hand and a serious expression on her face. "Yamada -" She began, but he cut her quickly off.
"I gotta get back home, Ches needs me."
"Some of the public are calling for you to get a paternity test."
Hizashi frowned. "Uh, Kayama..? Why the hell would I need that?"
"Read for yourself," she said drily, holding up her phone. She had pulled up the reddit post in question, now on the front page. It was filled with men agreeing with the idea in a frightening mob; almost every one taking the side that every baby should be tested to prove it was theirs.
Hizashi's face paled as he read. "No way! I love Ches," he whimpered. "I married her because I love and <i>trust</i> her completely. Asking her to do this is saying I don't an' it would be doing it when she's most emotionally vulnerable. She freakin' cried over a rip in a piece of paper the other day!"
"Exactly. This isn't a question when you're married and have no reason to believe your partner is cheating on you. It's controlling - a loyalty test, really -- and that's disgusting."
"Wait... wuh - wait. <i>What?!</i>" Hizashi nearly dropped his phone. "Oh, shit. Oh god. They linked it on twitter and added her!"
"You'd better move fast. You're right that she's an emotional time bomb. This will destroy her if she sees it!" Kayama grabbed his arm and pushed, propelling him out the door. "Quickly, Yamada!"
Elly had seen it.
Hizashi cringed hard the moment he reached the door to their apartment and heard her sobbing inside. He made short work of the lock and darted in, not bothering to take off his shoes.
"M'here, babe!"
Elly was sitting in a pregnant sprawl on their couch with a box of tissues by her side. The pile of wadded up ones all around her was alarming, showing she'd been crying a long while.
"I'll do anything you want," she sobbed, clutching at the open front of his black shirt when he flung himself beside her. "We can get the test done after the baby is born -"
Hizashi's mind reeled. "I don't need that!" He wrapped his arms around her, humming in a soothing fashion. "Look, princess, those're just some stupid assholes on the internet. You're not some one night stand accusing me of getting you pregnant. We're <i>married</i>. We <i>wanted</i> this, an' I'm <i>happy</i>. You're givin' me the most ultimate gift ya can ever give, the most love you can show. What terrible person would question the woman they love like that?!"
"Yeah," she sniffled weakly. "Where's their loyalty test for them, then? How is the married woman supposed to make sure the guy isn't fucking all the bitches."
Hizashi snorted laughter. "'All the bitches.'"
"True, though! He questions her on this, well, when does it stop? What if she stays late at work one day? Does he automatically think she's cheating?" She paused, her ears flat and eyes lit up from within. Hizashi let her go on, rubbing her upper back gently.
"And what about the idiots who are all like, 'if she doesn't want the test and says she's hurt by the lack of trust it <i>proves</i> she's guilty'?" She spat angrily. "Bullshit! They're projecting. Most people would be pissed if they were questioned like this out of the blue. If they felt this way they should've told their prospective wives <i>before</i> marrying them. Then it wouldn't become a trust issue. And she could flat out reject a guy if she knew he was that paranoid."
"Agreed. But we can't ignore them; we're celebrity heroes. How about ya let me handle this one, love?"
"Okay. I'd only rip them apart anyway."
He snickered. "They deserve it, but yeah, no. I'll take 'em down a peg."
A half an hour later the tweet from <b>Present Mic (official)</b> was trending:
'<i>To those sayin I should have a paternity test done on our baby: I love</i> and <i>trust my wife, or I wouldn't've</i> married <i>her. Listen up: don't go there</i>.'
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