Gentleman's School

"Gentleman's School"

orig. 9/20/2017

One Piece - Zoro x Elly, PG-13

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The sunlight beating down on his tanned skin was warm, almost hot. Zoro had decided to take a nap after working out on the beach but he kept getting distracted...

The towel he'd placed underneath him wasn't enough protection against the sand slowly creeping over it. The grains were gritty against his legs and back, just enough to keep him at the edge of sleep.

Or so he convinced himself.

The real reason he couldn't doze off like he normally could was that the stupid cook was fawning over the stupid cat. Zoro frowned and deliberately turned to one side so he couldn't peer through slitted eyes to watch. The red-haired wench was off shopping at the local town and the other was off doing something quiet, which couldn't be said for the rest of them. The two were the only ones on the beach beside him though as the others were still playing in the ocean. His frown grew harder, his brow furrowing more and more as he listened.

When Sanji asked if she wanted help with her suntan lotion, however, he snapped. In one smooth leap he was on his feet, boiling with rage. He snarled at the blond haired young man as he stalked over to where they were, grabbed Elly's wrist and yanked her away.

"What's wrong with you, asshole," she hissed at her captor, her eyes cold and hard. "Quit pulling on me."

"Get over here," He didn't think; just swept her into his arms to get her away from the others faster. Her body tensed rigidly for a brief moment.

The idiot! How dare he! Her thoughts were acidic as she glared up at the big man. His jaw was set, dark eyes staring straight ahead as he walked purposefully out into the playful wavelets to the huge gangplank. Yet even though he looked oddly resentful Elly knew he wouldn't harm her. During the long walk back to wherever he was taking her she gradually relaxed. He despised Sanji's antics in general so maybe that was why he had lashed out. She ignored the fact that he never cared when the cook catered to any other woman.

He grunted when he put her down on the main deck.

"Now what was that all about?" She raised her chin, lavender side locks whipping about her cheeks in the warm breeze. Zoro glanced aside with a scowl.

"Don't ."

"Excuse me?"

"I said you know better than that."

"What? I'm not allowed to be treated like the other girls?" Her biting reply announced that she thought the opposite.

He blinked. "...you like that bullshit?!"

"Every woman likes to be treated like she's beautiful sometimes!" She lashed out and struck him lightly across the chest with her palm. The slap was meant to be ineffectual; she knew she wouldn't hurt him if she tried. It was the gesture that counted and he backed away looking even more puzzled.

The sting of tears pricked her eyes. "No one ever treated me like that before. He never even does because he's always after them and I'm always wearing fur!" To put it bluntly, Elly now felt depressed. She had a light crush on the lecherous cook and his attentions had been boosting her ego. She'd begun to think that maybe she wasn't hideous in this pale, naked human form after all. The girls assured her she wasn't yet the men's attention - or lack of it -- confirmed her suspicions. Her body was thicker in general than the others and she had a proportional bust instead of one that looked like two giant watermelons perched precariously on top of a twig. Her hair wasn't long or lustrous and she was usually in her cat form because she was more comfortable in it.

The swordsman stood dumbfounded as she changed form and bounded away to hide in the bowels of the ship. When her tail tips had disappeared into the open door that stood at the end of the deck Zoro spun, his hand on the hilts of his swords. Sanji was leaning against the railing, a cigarette casually held between his long fingers.

"You, my friend, are a complete idiot." He raised the cigarette and took a long, calm drag. "Nice work."

"Not my fault," Zoro snarled between clenched teeth.

"You're dumber than I thought you were if you really believe that." His leg snapped up, absently blocking the blades aimed at him.

"Also not my fault that you're obsessed with girls." Zoro reluctantly sheathed his katana and glared harder at the cocky young man.

"Have you ever seen her cry?" Sanji's blunt question startled the big man.

"Of course not!" He waved his hand curtly through the air. "She doesn't do any of that nonsense."

"You might want to readjust your thinking. She's human ..." He paused at Zoro's snort. "Don't give me that. Chopper's human enough for all of us and he can't even turn all the way like she can. The point is that she likes you. You can hurt her."

"What the hell do you mean?"

"Fuck, she's got crappy taste in men." Sanji rolled his visible eye skyward and sighed. "Just go and see if you upset her or not. I'll be willing to admit defeat if she's not curled up someplace crying."

This was enough reason for Zoro to try and the blond man watched with some amusement as he stomped away. He came back not ten minutes later with a sour expression on his tanned features.

"How do I make it better?" He asked sullenly.

"I thought you'd never ask."




- -




It was obvious to Sanji that it would take something like a miracle to turn the grumpy, callous swordsman into anything resembling a gentleman. At first he resisted any attempt to teach him the soft, flattering words that came so naturally to the cook when he spoke to any lady.

He finally resorted to threats. "Do it or you'll fail. Look, it's not bullshitting them if you believe it, all right?"

"It's a bunch of..." What Zoro described doesn't bear repeating but it was quite colorful. The green haired young man was dressed in something different than what he usually wore. He sat with one leg cocked over the other, seemingly nonchalant but obviously uncomfortable. His shirt that day was of finely spun dark gray silk, open at the front, with slightly faded jeans in a darker hue. His gold earrings had given way to silver ones and he'd even gone so far as to discard his usual haramaki.

Sanji ran a hand through his sweep of golden hair and grimaced. "Give, idiot. I've seen you staring at her. Besides, why were you so pissed the other day? You like her, tell her. That's it. Tell her what you like about her. I'm just giving you little tips. Compliment her hair, her eyes, what she's wearing that day - ladies like to hear that. Try it, say something you like about her right now. Go." He knew he was pressing his luck but the other man was strangely meek, considering...

Zoro mumbled something.

"What?"

"I said - " He swore briefly, "she smells good." He looked profoundly embarrassed when he'd admitted this as if he'd said something silly. Sanji nodded though.

"Just practice. If you can say them out loud you can say them to her."

"Why do I have to say them while you're around though?" He thrust his jaw out pugnaciously at the smaller man.

"Because," Sanji said patiently, "if you say these things to her in public other people might hear. You have to be able to do it without choking on your food."

"Food?"

"You were planning on taking her out someplace to eat, right?"

"Take stupid cat out? On a ...?"

"Date. Yes. You'd better knock off that 'stupid' business while you're at it. Don't you ever call her by her name?"

"No." Zoro frowned.

"Never?"

"I said no, didn't I?"

"Well..." Sanji groped for an idea. "Just drop the 'stupid' part and it'll be fine, I guess. But you could call her something nicer." Zoro grunted and unfolded his legs from on top of the table they rersted on. He stood, wrenched his shoulders back in a vigorous stretch and grimaced at the crackling sound that emanated from his neck.

"I'll do it."

"Wait!" Sanji rushed forward before he could burst out the door. "Here, give her this when you do." He pressed a flower into the bigger man's rouugh palm.

"...you serious?"

"Just do it. Trust me."

He found her resting in one of the common rooms on the ship with an unread book laying beside her on a low divan. Zoro peered around first to make sure they were alone, then cleared his throat.

"What." Her tone was flat. She didn't bother to look at him but continued to stare morosely at the far wall.

"We're staying here for awhile," he began lamely. He knew what his plan of attack was but this was a different battleground. Zoro much preferred swords and oceans of blood to this awkward, blushing advance. He scowled at himself then sat down next to her. "You want to go out to eat? In town?"

She slowly turned her head to face him. "You said what?" She hadn't been paying attention and she struggled back to focus.

"Do you want to go out to eat tonight." He leaned closer, blushing but determined.

"Ah..." Elly was startled to find him inches away holding a sprig of lavender up before her eyes. It was her favorite flower.

"Say yes," he said firmly.

She blinked. "What's going on?" He was acting so different that she could tell something was up. But the warmth from his body and the familiar scent of her favorite flower mixed with the sharp tang of steel lulled her into a dreamy, vacant-eyed state. Zoro was amazed at how fast the silly tactics he'd been taught worked. He began to feel more confident again and the flush on his cheeks drew back from red to light pink.

"Do you want to go out with me or not?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Yes, but..."

"I'll come get you later tonight," he said as he tucked the flower cluster into her hair. "Eight."

"That late?" She stammered a little and cursed herself for doing so; he saw her wince. Zoro smiled and she grew even more flustered.

"Make sure you're ready," was all he said before leaving.





- -






"That was all he said?" Nami shook her head in disbelief.

"He doesn't waste words," Robin murmured. She watched with a gentle smile as Elly burst out of her bathroom again. The girls had all gathered together to offer advice and calm their nervous friend. They were currently helping her choose an outfit.

"What about this one?" She spun about girlishly, causing the dark green dress to flare about her legs. It had a light scattering of sequins on the bodice and was mid-thigh length.

"It's nice," Nami said dubiously.

"What's wrong with this one?" Elly demanded. "Wait, I know - it's too reserved for your taste."

"You might have to hit him over the head," the orange-haired girl said dryly. "He hasn't seemed interested in girls before."

"I disagree," Robin said, stretching. "That looks nice on her. Plus it matches his favorite colors. He'll wear green. They'll look good together."

"There's what I'm concerned about," Elly said worriedly. "He's just doing this to apologize out of some code of honor or something. He doesn't care about me that way."

"He's yelled at me a thousand times," Nami said wryly, "and never asked me out."

"He's just doing it because he thinks he has to," the plumper girl asserted.

"Ask him if you're so concerned," Robin suggested mildly. "But since it's almost time, we'd better get going..."

"Erk."

Nami winked at her. "You're so sure he's not serious! I'd be prepared for anything if I were you."

"What?"

Robin chuckled under her breath and dragged her away before Elly could comment further. They left just in time, for it was only minutes before there was a light, almost diffident tap on her door. He was wearing some green as Robin had predicted; he had on a dark charcoal jacket and pants with his typical haramaki. He had decided not to leave his swords behind as Sanji had delicately suggested but the green looked like a cummerbund and didn't detract from the outfit. He wore no tie and the first couple of buttons on his shirt were open.

They both hesitated when they saw each other.

Then he cleared his throat. "Ready?"

"Yes." She walked out, setting her heels firmly on the wooden decking as if reassured by the clacking sounds her heels made. She stopped after a few steps, however, when his hand touched her arm. Elly paused, uncertain of what he wanted and nearly choked when he slipped his arm about hers.

It was a silent stroll to the restaurant where he'd reserved a table. They kept glancing at each other nervously, neither one sure of what to say. Zoro's head was filled with the ideas Sanji had given him but every time he opened his mouth to say something it felt fake and he clamped his lips shut.

Needless to say he pretty much flubbed the entire evening.

It was somehow rewarding to see the big man flounder around so desperately, Sanji mused as he watched from his vantage point at a table hidden in the shadows. The fact remained that the poor girl was convinced this was only a half-hearted effort to make up for something. He sighed and left before they did, his mind racing.

Zoro was not very happy. When he set out to accomplish a task he always finished. He wasn't satisfied with halfway measures and he firmly believed that he was incapable of "losing" in any area as long as he tried his damndest. But try though he might, he couldn't flatter and cater to this dark-haired woman that had shot into his life like a furry comet. The words the idiot cook had wanted him to say were somehow there, he just couldn't voice them. When he finally did speak it always ended up sounding wrong. Angry more with himself than anything, he gently took her by the arm again to lead her back to the ship.

Elly was quiet on the walk back. She had dreamed of this but it wasn't what she thought it would be. Even though she was sure he was only apologizing, however, dinner had been bittersweet. She'd tried not to stare at him in his finery that made him even more handsome than she'd thought possible. She'd struggled to not cling to him when he offered her his arm on both trips to and from the shore. What she really wanted to do was wrap her arms tightly around his body and bury her head in that strong chest. Instead she walked sedately by his side, thanking him with a smile when they reached the gangplank.

"Such an early night for a date," Sanji remarked casually, stepping out of the shadows alongside the ship. Zoro blinked at him.

"Well, dinner's done," Elly shrugged with a weak smile that made the blond man's heart ache. "What else is there to do, right?"

"A walk on the beach, maybe? Under the half-full moon?" He sighed and held out his hand while Zoro choked. He glared at the chef, his teeth bared in a frightening scowl. Sanji rolled his visible eye and turned his back on the swordsman, tugging gently so she joined him.

"Oh, why not," she sighed hopelessly. She bent, removed her shoes and laid them by the wooden walkway back to the ship. The two walked off along the cool, wet sand with the crashing of the ocean accompanying their small talk. Some distance away from where they'd begun, Sanji paused.

"He really does like you, you know," he murmured. He slipped an arm about her shoulders.

"Yes. We're friends."

"No." Sanji laughed. "No, beautiful, not that way. He's nearly throwing those big dumb knives of his at my back for taking you away from him. He would do this with you, but he's not good at romance."

"But..."

"Cook!" They both turned in surprise to find the big man standing behind them with his fists clenched. His face was mottled with anger. "Quit touching my girl!"

Elly's eyes went wide and she nearly fell to the sand under her feet. Sanji prudently stepped clear as she wobbled and Zoro caught her deftly about the waist. The slender young man stepped backwards as he shook one fist at him.

"What just happened?" She gasped. Her cheeks were stained a light pink from nervousness and he immediately forgot his treacherous crewmate and turned his attention to her instead.

"You almost fell," he mumbled.

"Oh." She gulped. "Um. Thanks." It was hard to formulate sentences when he held her lightly against his side. She could feel his big hand grasping her midsection.

"You want help there?" The other man raised a curly eyebrow.

"No," Zoro said. "I told you, back off." His arm slipped more possessively around her waist and she flinched slightly, then relaxed.

"What was that?" Sanji asked pleasantly.

"I said she's with me, not you." He turned her with him and walked off down the beach.

"You were jealous that day," she marveled. Zoro grunted sourly.

"Just irritated," he said shortly. "If you wanted attention you should have said something."

"To you? Oh, that would have been pleasant. You're always 'stupid cat' this and 'stupid cat' that."

He took a deep breath. He was not going to screw up again. His nervousness dissipated when he viewed the scenario more like a battle and he steeled himself to win no matter what.

"I'm me," he rumbled in a low tone. "That's how I am. Do you know who you are?" He paused to let that sink in, then leaned even closer so their noses were almost touching. She looked decidedly cute with her huge eyes trained on his lips so deliberately close to her own. He started to shake the thought off instinctively, then stopped.

He told her instead.

Elly blinked. "Wh - what?"

"Your eyes are pretty."

"Was this a dare or something?" Her voice shook; she whispered so low that he almost couldn't hear her.

"...and you're scared." He reached up and gently touched her cheek. "Not a stupid cat right now. More like ..." He paused. "A kitten."

"Zoro." He hushed her and she snapped her mouth closed, amazed.

"Kitten," he murmured softly, his hands coming up to caress her hair.

Sanji's grin grew into a self-satisfied smirk as he watched the silhouettes draw closer together near the frothing water. Not only had he made her happy now but that idiot owed him big time.